how can u be prego again
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
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