I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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