If you die in college, do you die in real life?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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