why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
you're hired as official boob wrangler
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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