enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
