who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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