While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
