forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
