I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
