You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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