3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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