Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I queefed so loud it echoed.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
