Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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