haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
