People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize