we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
