In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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