All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
