i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
