But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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