sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
