So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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