Got a toothbrush?
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
