So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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