Sober January is a disaster.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
