he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
