You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
