I wish i was in the wii world.
ugly people sure do ruin things
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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