You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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