My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
