u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize