I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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