Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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