Apparently you make a good broom.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize