If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize