Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
