you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
