I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
