i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
