God, you're like boner-b-gone
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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