bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
