now i know why i became what i already was.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
