she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
