:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
