What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
