It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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