I feel like I'm in dance class right now
that's an acceptable place to lick
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
