Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
