No awkward lesbian experiences without me
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
