Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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