For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
